Changing Our Hearts

I heard a story once about a Christian family who raised their children up in church and in the things of the Lord. However, when one of the children got older, they decided it was time they sowed some wild oats. They began to rebel against the things of God. They ended up leaving the church, and while the relationship with their parents was rocky, it was not cut off completely. As the rebellious child continued to stray farther from the things of God, this child ended up marrying during this season of their life. This was a challenging time for both mom and dad to watch their child go through. First of all for them, they had not planned for their child to ever leave the things of God, much less ever marry someone who did not have a personal relationship with the Lord. In many ways it left their hearts bitter, angry and frustrated with their child. It effected their own walks with the Lord. Although the parents never walked away from the things of God, they struggled getting past the fact that their child did not walk down the path that they thought God had for them.

The Father of the Prodigal Son

I share this story because I want to discuss how this modern day story relates to the biblical story of the prodigal son. I’m sure most of us are familiar with this story, and this is not the first time I have mentioned it on my blog. The last time I shared it, I talked about the heart of the son in a blog post entitled “Seeking The Value In God’s Rewards.” (Feel free to revisit that post if you would like.) Today I want to talk about the heart of the father. If you are unfamiliar with the story, or you need a refresher, please read it in Luke 15:11-32. It truly will bless your heart whether you are reading it for the first time or for the one hundredth time!

Lately with many of the Bible stories that I have been reading I have begun to look at the characters through the lens of humanness. I feel like so many times I have read these stories and assumed that the characters did not struggle with any sin nature, as if they somehow had been above the deeds of the flesh. It has brought my spirit great peace to realize that each one was human just like myself. They struggled with emotions, irrational thinking, and frustrations just as I do.

So, when I think about the father in this story through this lens, here is what transpires. I am quite sure that the father was heartbroken on many levels. He was probably struggling with mixed emotions of not wanting his son to leave, but furious at the fact that his own flesh and blood would even consider disowning his family in this manner. The father probably had to work through emotions such as bitterness, anger and disgust. Honestly, if I was the father I’m quite sure I would be struggling with these very same emotions and possibly some additional ones as well. This is how my thinking would probably have transpired if I was the father; “Here is my son whom I spent my whole life pouring into and this is how he repays me. He takes half of everything I own, and may I remind you it took my entire lifetime to earn this and then he leaves his family in the dust. I can’t believe that my son has the audacity to even think about doing such a thing. He has brought shame to this entire household. I’m not sure if I can ever forgive him for this!”

Human Nature
This is the very nature of our humanness! We forget that this man was just that, human. Please note, I am well aware of the fact that this is a parable that Jesus is telling and it is not an actual true person. But please hang with me as I walk you through my thinking here. If this had been an actual person, then it is completely probable that the father felt this way when his son left home. Now, how is it even possible for him to get to a place where he runs to meet his son with arms wide open when he returns? By the time his son returns, the father’s heart had done a complete 180 degree turn. The father’s heart went from being full of bitterness, anger and frustration, to being full of love, mercy, compassion and grace! That is only by the hand of the Lord that this father was able to accept his son back without any hesitation in his heart.

This story would have had a very different ending if the father had not turned his heart over to the dealings of the Lord. If he had not allowed the Lord to work on his heart than when the son ended up coming home, the father would have still been harboring bitterness and unforgiveness in his heart toward his son. More than likely he would not  have accepted his son back and probably put him back on the streets to disown him just as his son had done to him earlier. Because the heart of the father had turned, the relationship could be healed and salvation came to that young man’s life.

Dealings of the heart
Getting back to my original story, these parents are no different then the father. They are heartbroken, and the only way for their hearts to be healed is for them to allow the hand of God to begin to change some things in their lives. Only God knows whether or not this family will ever see their child walking in the ways of the Lord again. But as long as the focus is on that child’s wrongs, than healing can not take place in the hearts of the parents and the relationship can not be mended. If the hearts of the parents are not changed, then even if their child's heart is changed the relationship will still be broken because the parents will still be holding on to bitterness and unforgiveness. Things will not get better without their hearts changing first!. I have said this before and forgive me as I say it again. God is more interested in healing our hearts than he is in rescuing us from our struggles!

Many times in our own lives we struggle with situations that bring us to a place of bitterness, frustration and anger. When we put our eyes on Jesus it is than that our hearts can be changed! It can be so hard at times to get our focus off our problems and on to the only one who has the ability to solve our problems. But just because we put our focus on the Lord does not mean He is going to work things out the way we want. We have to trust that He is going to change our hearts for a much greater purpose than what we can see directly in front of us. God is working things out for eternity and not just for the here and now.  

Lord, thank you that you are more interested in healing our hearts than you are in rescuing us from the turmoil that we find ourselves in. You are working on us for eternity, not merely for the here and now. Help us not to get so hung up on the disappointments in life that we miss what you are trying to do in our hearts. Help us to keep our focus on you so that you can work out your will in our lives. You have such wonderful plans for our lives. Help us not to miss out because we are focusing on the wrong things.