Saturday, April 7, 2018

Do you love me?

15 When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”
“Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”
16 Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”
He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”
17 The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.
John 21: 15-17

I find it interesting in this passage of scripture that Jesus would ask Peter three times in a row if he loved Him. As you study out the original Greek and Hebrew of this word love you realize why. In the English language we just have one word for love, but many definitions, or expressions of the word love. However, in the Greek, there are six different words for love with six very distinct meanings and expressions. In the Hebrew, they have three different words for love, each conveying a very different weight and connotation to it. I feel like the original language does a better job of helping us to see into the heart of Peter in this passage better than our current English translation can. 

The original Greek
I wanted to take some time and examine the Greek words used in this passage. When Jesus asks Peter the first time if he loves Him (vs 15). That word love in the Greek is agape. This word carries a unique weight to it because it is the word used in scripture time and time again to describe the way God loves. Agape love is an all-consuming passion for the well being of the one being loved. It is a love that esteems, elevates, prizes, and delights in others expecting nothing in return. It keeps loving when the love is not reciprocated when the one being loved is unkind, unlovable, unworthy and rejecting the love being given. It is an unconditional love that only desires the best for the one being loved and nothing less. Doesn’t that just sound like our Heavenly Father? Agape love is God. That is the very definition of who He is. Agape love is how He loves us! 



Now that we understand the weight associated with this word agape, let’s return to Peter. When Jesus asks “do you agape me?” I can just picture Peter squirming a bit and somewhat getting defensive as he answers… “you know I love you.” But here is where it gets interesting. Peter does not respond with the word agape. He responds with a completely different word for love and he says... “you know I “philos” you Lord.” 

This word philos has an entirely different meaning and carries a much lighter weight than the word agape. It is a word that means brotherly love, a friendship kind of love. It is a fondness or a liking for another person. I read one definition that actually went as far as to say that this type of love can collapse in times of crisis. When I read this it made me stop and wonder if Peter was unknowingly foreshadowing his coming denial of knowing Jesus (Luke 22:54-71) when he said... of course I philos you, Lord. 

If we keep reading Jesus asks Peter a second time “do you truly agape me?” Again, I can picture Peter still squirming and feeling a bit perturbed with Jesus’ questioning… “Yes, Lord, you know that I philo you.” Now, for a second time in a row, Peter did not answer with the same word. I wonder if that word agape had such weight in the original Greek that it was too much for Peter to even speak? 

Finally, Jesus asked Peter a third time if he loved Him, but this time instead of agape He used philo, love of the friendship variety, a brotherly kind of love. Peter again replied with… “you know that I philo you.” Finally, Peter’s answer was lining up with Jesus’ question!

I don’t believe Jesus was trying to exasperate Peter here by repeating the same question over and over again, but I do believe Jesus was trying to make a point. We serve a God that loves us with an all-consuming kind of love, a love that cannot be broken, weakened or taken away. What Christ was showing here is His desire for us to love Him with that level of passion. As I studied this out I found myself asking...Do I really agape the Lord? Do I really love Christ in the manner He desires for me to love Him? God desires an all in composing, all-consuming kind of agape love. Do I even remotely give that type of love to Him or is it more of the friendship variety?
Just like Peter, I can honestly say that I absolutely philo the Lord, but agape Him is a whole new dimension, one that I wonder if I have remotely come close to.  

Call to action
How about you? Do you love the Lord with the weight of an agape kind of love, or does it lean more towards the philo or friendship type? I know there are some of us out there who can honestly answer that we love the Lord in an all-encompassing, all-consuming agape type of love. But for those of us whose love for the Lord leans more towards the philos variety, we have some work to do.  I wish I could say I have answers for moving from one level of love to another, but I do not. I will be seeking the Lord to reveal to my heart how to make that transition. I am just thankful that the Lord brought me to a place where I noticed there was a difference. 

To read more on the topic of love visit the series on love.

Father, thank you for showing me the difference between the agape love that you shower upon me and the philos love that I end up returning. My heart’s prayer is that you bring me to a place where I can love you and others with an agape love, one that does not have expectations involved. I pray for anyone reading this post that may need to make a change in their level of love for you, that you deal with their hearts compassionately and gently. Lead them to a greater understanding of agape love. Show us, Lord, how to love like you! Show us how to agape others!

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