Challenge # 8 - Scripture Blitz

It has been over a year since we did our last scripture blitz challenge! It is hard to believe how time has flown by so quickly. For those of you who participated in our last scripture blitz you will be familiar the expectations. For those of you who are joining us for the first time, WELCOME! We are so glad you can be a part of our second scripture blitz!

The purpose for our scripture blitz is simply to memorize scripture.

“Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly...” Colossians 3:16a

“Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” Psalm 119:105

Mapping out the Expectations :

1. If you did our last scripture blitz and you remember which scriptures you set aside to memorize for that challenge, then pull those back out and review them each week.
2. Diligently work at committing to memory at least one new scripture per week for this month. So hopefully by the end of this month you will have at least four scriptures written on your heart. As always you are always welcome to do do more if you would like.

I must confess I struggled the last time we did this scripture blitz. I did not commit to memory the number of scriptures I wanted. Please know that the point to this challenge is getting the word of the to dwell in us richly. If it is one verse or 30 verses, it doesn’t matter, just so long as we are making a point to write God’s word on the tablets of our hearts. Scripture is our life line. We never know when we are going to need to pull from the tablets of our hearts for situations that we face.

I pray that you will be diligent about memorizing scripture this month. I pray this for myself as well. Blessings to you on your scripture blitz journey!

Claiming Philippians 4:13

“11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:11-13

Philippians 4:13 is a verse that we hear a lot in the christian world. For some of us it might even  be one of our battle verses. However, I feel that we have a tendency to overlook the importance of the verses that Paul laid out before this verse in order for claim Philippians 4:13 over his life. If we take a look at verse 11 Paul states… “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances” and in verse 12 he says… “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation.” How many of us can truly say that? If we take a close look at Paul’s life we will see his life was far from smooth sailing. In fact, Paul wrote this letter to the church of Philippi from prison. If you recall from my post “Joseph’s Journey” you will remember the wretched conditions that Joseph faced while in prison and Paul more than likely experienced those very same conditions. He was by no means in any way shape or form comfortable by any earthly standards. Yet even in the midst of some of the most grotesque conditions Paul was able to say that he was content. How is this even remotely possible? The answer to this lies in the fact that contentment is not something we just acquired out of thin air. Paul stated  twice that he had to learn to be content. I can only figure that since he went through the trouble of repeating himself that there is some great importance to this learning process. Paul had to work hard and continually at being content. There was no automatic button for him to push. It took seeking the face of God in some of the most difficult situations.

Paul’s life

I want to expand this further and take a broader look at the hardships that Paul faced in his lifetime so we can get a better understanding of just how hard Paul had to work at fostering a spirit of contentment in any and every situation that came along his path. Let’s list out some of the challenges Paul experienced. This is not an exhaustive list, but is just to give you a small taste of the things he faced in his lifetime.

• Continually battled with the “thorn” in his side - 2 Corinthians 12:7-9
• Shipwrecked three times - 2 Corinthians 11:25
• he was stoned - 2 Corinthians 11:25

• Scrutinized and ostracized by Christians - Acts 13:50
• Received countless death threats - Acts 9:23, Acts 9:29
• Imprisoned for two years without a trial - see entire account Acts 23:33 - 26:32
• Attacked by a mob - Acts 21:27-30

• Beaten three times with rods - Acts 16:22-23, 2 Corinthians 11:25
• Whipped five times with 39 lashes each - 2 Corinthians 11:24
• Stoned and left for dead - Acts 14:19

Paul learned in the face of these things to be content! If Paul could be content while being whipped 39 times then certainly I should be able to find contentment when problems in my life arise, like when my car breaks down. Just thinking about that comparison humbles my heart greatly! The troubles that I face pale in comparison to the horrifying circumstances Paul had to face. But certainly if Paul had to learn contentment then so must I.  

Claiming this verse

Paul laid out for us the what is required in order to claim Philippians 4:13 over our lives and over our situations. If we want to be able to claim “I can do everything through him who gives me strength,” then we must first be content! From the example of Paul we can see just how much effort we must put forth in order to accomplish this. It will not be easy. It will not be fun at times. It is going to require us to take our eyes off our circumstances and put our eyes on our heavenly father. It requires us to remember that the character of God does not change because our circumstances have changed. Paul learned how to keep his eyes on Christ despite the circumstances. We can all take a lesson from the Apostle Paul in this area of contentment.

Thank you Lord for giving us the example of Paul’s life when it comes to teaching us what we must go through in order to master this area of contentment. We desire to be able to claim that we can do all things through you who gives us strength and in order to do that we must first learn how to be content in ALL circumstances. Help us to work daily on keeping our eyes focused on you and not on our circumstances. None of us have faced the long list of sufferings that Paul  faced, but in the midst of our trials they still seem so large. Help us to remember your character does not change in the midst of our difficult times. You are the same yesterday, today and forever and for that we are eternally grateful.

Jesus Chose The Least Of These

Jesus said... 

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28

Christ did put stipulations on the types of people who were allowed to come to Him. He simply said come to ALL. When I begin to look at the types of people included in this ALL it is quite humbling. Jesus was drawn to the social outcasts, the down cast, unloved and unwanted people of His day. I just wanted to share with you what I learned as I studied out some of these people. Please take some time and read through each of these amazing stories. I’m sure that your heart will be blessed  as you see Jesus loving up on the “underdog” in each of these stories.

• Luke 5:12-16 - Jesus heals a man with leprosy
• Mark 2:13-17 - Jesus eating with sinners and tax collectors
• John 4:1-42 - Jesus speaks with a Samaritan woman at the well
• John 8:1-11 - Jesus forgives an adulterous woman
• Luke 7:36-50 - Jesus dines in a pharisee's house, while a sinful woman (a prostitute) washes His feet
• Mark 5: 1-20 - Jesus delivers a demon possessed man
• Mark 5: 21-34  - Jesus heals the woman with the issue of blood

This is just a short list of people Jesus took the time to give of his attentions to. I would like to take some time and go through each one and explain why they were considered to be social outcasts. Most of them should be pretty obvious, but some of them may not be as well known as to why they were kept at an arm’s length. I was unaware of some of these until I spent some time studying each one out.

The leper

Leprosy is a chronic infection that causes severe skin sores and nerve damage. In Biblical times little was known about this particular disease so they would shun those with the disease to leper colonies. These individuals were forced away from their friends, families and social groups to fend for themselves with no one willing to help them in their suffering. It was thought that simply by being around someone with leprosy they too would contract this horrific disease. Today we know this is not the case. It is spread through contact with fluids from the nose or mouth. Jesus knew then what we know now. He was not afraid of this man. He touched this man when no one else would.

The tax collectors 

Those who bore the responsibility of this particular job were not viewed very positively among the people. The established governments of that time period were often very greedy and the tax collectors were expected to reinforce the expectations of the governing body. So they often took the brunt of the finger pointing and name calling when an oppressive government forced it’s citizens to pay more and more taxes. Jesus ate at this man’s house when no one else wanted anything to do with him.

The Samaritan woman 

The Samaritans were hated by the “faithful” Jewish culture. After the northern kingdom fell to the Assyrians, many Jews were deported to Assyria and and foreigners were brought to settle the land and help keep the peace. Intermarriage between these foreigners and remaining Jews resulted, creating a mixed race. This mixed race, known as the Samaritans, were considered impure by those Jews who lived in the southern kingdom. Thus the tension grew between the “pure” Jews (those in the southern kingdom) and the Samaritans. As if that tension were not enough, in this particular example this was not just a Samaritan Jesus was talking with, but this was also a woman, known publicly for the fact that she was living in sin. To the eyes of an outsider this particular woman had many strikes against her, which is probably why Jesus had such compassion upon her.

The adulterous woman 

This particular woman had been brought to Jesus by the Pharisees and teachers of the law whose main objective was to back Jesus into a trap. If they truly wanted to judge this woman according to the law of Moses then they would have also arrested the man involved as well. But their actions proved a total disregard for the law making their intentions completely unjust. Jesus knew all of this. He knew their intentions and He knew the heart of the woman. So with much wisdom He invited the one who is without sin to throw the first stone. He knew that He was the only one there capable of throwing any stones and He had no intention of doing so because His heart of compassion compelled Him to forgive.

Pharisees  

There was much hypocrisy bound up in the hearts of the Jewish leaders of that day. People were aware that they said one thing yet did the complete opposite. Jesus was of no exception to being aware this fact. But, He never gave up on this group of stubborn men. He proved this by having dinner with one Pharisee named Simon.

Sinful woman 

The label this woman carried was because she was publicly known as a prostitute. She was at Simon’s house during dinner. This woman had not been invited as a guest, but she entered the house and knelt at the feet of Jesus. Simon had neglected to do several customary social courtesies of that day, all of which this woman had tended to instead of the host. Christ’s heart was moved in compassion on this woman because of the love she poured out upon Him and her sins were forgiven.   

Demon possessed man 

The demon living in this man had caused so much terror in his life that he was forced to lived among the tombs. No one was strong enough to subdue him any longer. He was beyond any human intervention and needed supernatural deliverance. The name of the demon was Legion. A legion was the largest unit of the Roman army (3,000 to 6,000 soldiers). Just by the name of the demon we can see that it was not just one, but many that had overtaken this man. Jesus was not intimidated by the demon’s strength but rather had compassion on the human heart that was on the inside wishing for an escape from the nightmare. So Jesus delivered him for the torment.

Woman with issue of blood 

I have already written an entire post on this particular woman entitled “Touching The Hem Of His Garment.” Please feel free to revisit that post if you would like. This woman had seen every doctor and nothing could be done. She was considered to be beyond help. This particular woman sought out Jesus and He did not acknowledge her until the healing of her physical body had already taken place. However, this does not mean Christ’s heart was not moved in compassion on her. On the contrary, He did a much greater miracle in her life once He took the time to spend with her.

The list is quite impressive and this is by no means an all in composing list. But it does give us a sweet taste of Christ's heart. Now, how about us? How can we take this short list of outcasts and apply it to our daily lives? What types of people could we plug into this short list mentioned in this post.

• a man with leprosy = Someone struggling with cancer, or some other major chronic health issue
• tax collectors = those who might treat us unfairly
• Samaritan woman at the well = our enemies, those we have a difficult time getting along with 
• adulterous woman = the adulterous woman or man, those in unhealthy relationships, those who do not respect the sanctity of marriage 
• Pharacies = any unjust leaders or rulers, any unjust governing authorities, or politicians
• a prostitute = a prostitute
• a demon possessed man = someone hunted with a mental illness, someone with gender identity issues or someone with homosexuality issues
• a woman with the issue of blood = someone suffering from a chronic sickness, illness or disease, AIDS, HIV, etc.

I have listed some pretty difficult issues. But can I challenge you that if Jesus was walking here on earth today, these are exactly the types of people He would run into on our streets and in our societies. These are exactly the types of people His heart would long for. He desires the least of these and so should we. Do we have the compassion in our hearts to dine with unjust rulers, to set free the person with trans-gender issues? If not, why not? Why do our hearts not long to see these people set free from their chains and welcomed into the open arms of our loving savior? I love that Jesus spent so much time with the very people that society had rejected, ostracized and shunned. Studying out this list of people has given me a greater appreciation for my Lord. He never gives up on anyone! Jesus did not spend His time climbing the “social ladder” by associating with the elite crowd. He chose the least of these to spend His time with. The least of these is where Christ's heart is and the least of these is where our hearts should be also.

Lord, I  thank you for your beautiful example of loving up the least of these. Fill us with a greater level of love and compassion. We do not desire to stiff arm those around us from the chance to hear your word and feel your love and compassion through us. Soften our hearts in those moments when we would normally want to run the other direction. Give us the words to say and the right actions in these moments. We want to go where you have sent us and do what you have called us to do, even if those things don’t seem real glamorous in the eyes of this world. We know that we are not called to a life of glamour here on earth. We are called to the least of these just like you have shown us in your word. Help us to follow your example we pray.

Beauty Traits

What makes a woman beautiful? This world wants us to think that beauty is what we see with our eyes, but what does God see as beautiful? When I searched the scriptures I had mixed emotions by the list of things I found. I was encouraged and blessed, but at the same time overwhelmed with the responsibility involved with the characteristics that encompass Godly beauty. This is why I am so grateful that I serve a God who will help me in the areas that I am lacking in Godly beauty. I have a lot of verses to share today, so please bear with me as we walk through scripture together and dig out the deep truths about what Godly beauty looks like. I hope that we all can be blessed by these characteristics. This list that is by no means an all inclusive list, but it is a good stepping stone to helping us gain a better perspective on what God finds beautiful.

The Lord’s definition of beauty

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord.You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.” 1 Peter 3:3-6

A truly beautiful woman allows her inner qualities to shine far and above anything that might be seen from her outside appearance. There is nothing wrong with taking care of the outward appearance, but when this takes priority over developing the inner qualities that the Lord desires then we have missed the mark of what beauty truly looks like. As far as some of these inner qualities go, this particular passage highlights three main qualities of importance. 

• The beautiful woman exhibits a gentle spirit.
• The beautiful woman exhibits a quiet spirit. 

Now, just because a woman exhibits these qualities does not mean that she gets snowballed over in times when she needs to stand up for righteousness. A woman who exhibits a gentle and quiet spirit knows how to navigate difficult situations with love and kindness, but with firmness and self control as well. She knows how to restore a situation gently without compromising righteousness. She knows how to serve the Lord and others in the face of her trials and storms. 

• The beautiful woman submits herself to her husband.

I have briefly touched upon what submission is and isn’t in a previous post entitled “A Mother’s Commission.” under the section “Submit to our husbands.” Please take a moment to revisit this post so that we are all on the same page about what submission looks like. There is much confusion in the body of Christ on this topic and I truly want us to be clear on this particular topic. Please also note here that just because a woman is not married does not make her exempt from this area of submission. The Lord has placed in our lives others for us to willingly submit to and for the single woman, some of these people can include her parents as well as church leaders.  

“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30

• A beautiful woman fears the Lord.

It is so easy to get sidetracked by the cares and and things that this world views as important. However, these things are temporal. They are fleeting. They are not eternal. A woman is beautiful when she does not allow the vanities of this life to distract her from loving the Lord. A woman is beautiful when she fears the Lord. This word “fears” does not mean to be afraid, it means to have a reverent respect and love for the Lord. In this day and age it is a rare woman who places the Lord above all that the world throws her direction.

“Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.” Proverbs 11:22

• A beautiful woman shows discretion.

Just as it would be foolish to put a precious gold ring in a pig’s snout, it would be just as foolish not to use discretion in our appearance. In this verse, “no discretion” literally means “without taste or modesty.” When we show discretion we are aware that what we wear can have a direct effect on others. When we make a poor judgment on what we wear, we create the potential for others to stumble into a place of sin. It is our responsibility as woman to do what we can to not only keep ourselves from sin, but also to do what is within our control not to tempt our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ into a place of sin as well.

“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” Proverbs 31:25

• A beautiful woman clothes herself with strength and dignity.
• A beautiful woman laughs at the days to come.

This scripture shows us that a beautiful woman clothes herself in strength and dignity. Just like we daily put on clothing so we should daily put on strength. The strength in this verse is not speaking of a physical strength, but rather a strength of mind and strength of heart. So where do we go to get this strength of mind and heart? Our strength comes from the Lord and from His word (Psalm 28:7-8, Psalm 118:14, Psalm 119:28). We clothe ourselves in strength by daily spending time with the Lord. We should also daily put on dignity. Dignity means honor, splendor beauty, majesty and excellence. Once again, we can only clothe ourselves in these things if we spend time with the Lord and in his word.

I recently heard Nancy Leigh DeMoss on a program called “Revive Our Hearts” share her thoughts about this verse. She stated that “The most important pieces in your wardrobe do not hang in your closet. You can’t buy them at the mall. It’s the clothing of godly character and moral strength.” What a beautiful reminder to us as Christian woman that we are not to put our focus on the temporal things of this world, but on the eternal things of the kingdom!

This verse also highlights the fact that a beautiful woman can laugh (some versions use the word smile) at the days to come. In other words, she has no fear about the future. Nancy Leigh DeMoss also shared a commentary by John Wesley on this verse that said “She lives in constant tranquility of mind from a just confidence in God’s gracious providence.” How thought provoking is that to be the kind of woman who lives in a constant state of tranquility in thinking. I know I am nowhere near this place! I tend to worry and fret in situations that I really should just hand over to the Lord and have faith in Him that He is going to bring me through. But rather then letting tranquility rule my mind, worry and strife in my thoughts seem to overtake me at times. This is one of those areas I find myself taking to the Lord frequently in prayer!

“I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” 1 Timothy 2:9-10

• A beautiful woman dresses modestly with decency and propriety.
• A beautiful woman practices good deeds.

I touched on the topic of modesty and its importance in the body of Christ already, so I will not repeat myself here. I do however want to point out the other item in this verse, and that is a beautiful woman routinely chooses to practice good deeds. She clothes herself with good deeds. Again, just like we clothe ourselves daily, so a beautiful woman puts on good deeds daily. She consciously makes an effort to look outside her own wants and desires and looks towards the needs of others.

“In the same way, the women are to be worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything.” 1 Timothy 3:11

• A beautiful woman is worthy of respect, not malicious in talk.
• A beautiful woman is temperate and trustworthy in everything.

This verse is part of a letter written by Paul to Timothy about how the wives of deacons should act. However, the character traits mentioned in this verse apply to all women not just solely those who are wives of deacons. A beautiful woman is worthy of respect. In order to gain respect she must be one who is modest in behavior, inspires reverence, has a sense of purity and sanctity about her. A beautiful woman does not speak maliciously about anyone or anything. She is careful to guard her tongue from becoming a weapon as opposed to a form of encouragement to those around her. We must be careful to speak words that are going to build others up rather than tear them down. A beautiful woman is temperate trustworthy in everything she does. She has been tested and found to be honest in all that she does. (Descriptions of each trait in this verse is derived from Ellicott's Commentary for English Readers.)

“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.” Matthew 5:8

• A beautiful woman is pure in heart.

It should be our goal to see the face of God each and every day. I will guarantee that if we see God’s face each day that so many of the distractions of this life will fall away. They will no longer be a distraction to our spirit because our focus will not be on the things of this world, our focus will be on the things of God. By seeking the face of God each and every day it in turn keeps our hearts in a place of purity. It works like a cycle. A pure heart helps us to keep our focus on the Lord, and our focus being kept on the Lord helps us to keep a pure heart.

“I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” Psalm 119:11

• A beautiful woman hides God's word in her heart.

A beautiful woman takes the time and energy to invest in writing God’s word on her heart. This investment should be a pleasure as opposed to a drugging chore. We should be willing to take time each and every day to not only read God’s word, but to make a conscious effort to apply it our lives, to make the things that we are reading a physical reality in our everyday living. When we do this act of “hiding God’s word in our hearts,” we aid in guarding ourselves from deliberately sinning against the Lord. Does this mean that by applying God’s word to our daily lives we somehow become angelic and sin no longer tempts us? Absolutely not! We still have the potential to sin and to fall short of the glory of God, but we will not purpose in our hearts to choose sinful behaviors. The more we hide God’s word in our hearts, the less likely we are to deliberately chose sin over righteousness.

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Colossians 3:12

• A beautiful woman clothes herself in compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

A beautiful woman makes sure to put on daily the clothing of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. What a list! These things are not automatic. They take work! And some of these things need more work than others. Some days we can be faced with the need to pull out several layers of some of these areas. For example, let’s take a day when our kids are testing us to the limits. On these days we might need to put on an undershirt, a short sleeve shirt, a long sleeve shirt, a sweater, and a jacket of patience! Can anyone relate to what I’m saying here? We need to do whatever it takes to make sure that when we get up in the morning we are putting all of these things on! It is difficult, but not impossible. And on those days when we don’t feel like putting on one or more of these things we need to make sure we spend some time in prayer, because the Lord can help us get dressed on those mornings we are having difficulty. The Lord is more than willing to help us when we fall short in some of these areas.  And for that I am so grateful! I have had and still continue to call on the Lord to help me in these areas. This is a daily process.

Let's recap shall we.

A Beautiful Woman...

• let’s her beauty flow from her inner qualities (inner self) - 1 Peter 3:3-6
• has a gentle and quiet spirit - 1 Peter 3:3-6
• submits to her own husband (if she is single then to her parents and leaders) - 1 Peter 3:3-6

• fears the Lord - Proverbs 31:30

• uses discretion in the way she presents herself - Proverbs 11:22

• clothes herself in strength and dignity - Proverbs 31:25
• has the ability to laugh at the days to come, she does not fear the future, she looks forward to the future with joy - Proverbs 31:25

• dresses modestly. She chooses attire carefully with awareness of the potential temptations that attire can cause - 1 Timothy 2:9-10

• routinely chooses to practice good deeds - 1 Timothy 2:9-10

• is worthy of respect - 1 Timothy 3:11
• does not speak maliciously of anyone or anything - 1 Timothy 3:11
• is temperate and trustworthy in everything she does - 1 Timothy 3:11

• is pure in heart - Matthew 5:8

• hides the word in her heart to keep from sinning against the Lord - Psalm 119:11

• clothes herself with compassion - Colossians 3:12
• clothes herself with kindness - Colossians 3:12
• clothes herself in humility - Colossians 3:12
• clothes herself with gentleness - Colossians 3:12
• clothes hers patience - Colossians 3:12

Now that you can see this list all together you can see my initial reservations. I need the Lord’s help in some of these areas, and sometimes on an hourly bases! You might find a few areas that could use some work in your life as well. God is more than able to help us in any and all areas that we are lacking in the beauty department. Praise the Lord for that one! If the Lord wasn’t willing to help us, then by the biblical definition of the word beauty, we would all have a case of the uglies. We can not make ourselves beautiful. We have to rely on the Lord to change our ugliness into beautiful. He is working on his masterpiece in our lives and turning us from a commoner to royalty.   

Lord, I thank you that you do not look at the outward appearance, but rather you look at our hearts. Thank you that you are more concerned with making our hearts beautiful than our bodies beautiful. You are creating a masterpiece out of our hearts. Help us when we are tempted to look in the mirror and speak negatively about what you have created. Help us to remember that what we see in the mirror is not what you are looking at. Help us to clothe ourselves in strength, dignity, compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience each and every day. And on those days when we are having trouble getting dressed with these articles of clothing, help us to come to your feet so that you can help us to get dressed in the areas we are lacking. Thank you Lord that you desire each one of us to be beautiful. Help us to look at beauty through your eyes each and every day.

The Excuses

One of the first parenting classes my husband and I went through together we were inundated with so many invaluable things, but one particular lesson that seemed to really stick with us was the importance of not excusing away poor behavior. This is something many of us parents are guilty of, including myself. Let me give you some examples of what I am talking about here. If our child is having a melt down in the checkout line at the grocery store and the only thing we do is make a comment to the person standing behind us that goes something like this… “I’m so sorry. He is not usually like this. We are late for his nap. He is so tired and that’s why he is acting like this.”  Let me put this into perspective for what has just been done in the eyes of this child. In his little mind he is thinking “Mom just gave me permission to act like this anytime I am late getting down for my nap. I am allowed to act like this when I am tired. I can also act up when we are out in public because she isn’t doing anything to make me stop, so it must be fine by her. So, I will act like this the next time we are in the grocery store and see what happens.”

We can not be so naive to think that our children do not pick up on the excuses we make for their unacceptable behavior. Our excuses for our child’s poor behavior does not make their behavior right. So, why do we justify away their poor behavior? I think most of these excuses happen in the public eye. So because of this, we are embarrassed and don’t know how to handle the situation. However, the excuses in parenting are not limited to the times we are in public. Let me give you an example of what it might look like in our own homes. It is just before dad will be getting home from work. We are tired, our feet hurt and we have a headache. The kids start bickering and instead of dealing with it right away, we let them to continue bickering because we are too tired to deal with them any more. How many of us have played the “I’m too tired” excuse card? I know I have a time or two! No matter how many excuses we make, if we don’t deal with the poor behavior we will only see it get worse. Excuses are one of the many tools that the devils uses to gain access to the hearts of our children. When we excuse poor behavior away rather than deal with it on the spot we are giving our children permission to act that way again. So, when the next episode comes around, it it is only going to be harder to get them to stop. We are always better off dealing with a poor behavior choice the first time we see it rather than allow that behavior to continue by making an excuse for it.

“Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline [correction administered with godly wisdom and loving kindness] will remove it far from him.” Proverbs 22:15 (Amplified)

The Bible tells us that our children have foolishness in their heart. It is our responsibility as parents to get it out, not excuse it away and hope that it doesn’t come back. The reality is this, it will never go away with our excuses. It will always come back and most of the time it will come back with vengeance. This verse talks about using the rod of discipline or correction to remove the foolishness. One thing I like about the Amplified version is that it reinforces to us the proper way to use the rod of correction, “administered with godly wisdom and loving kindness.” What a great reminder to us as parents! (I have written in  an earlier post touching on this very topic,called  “A Mother’s Commission.” Please feel free to revisit that post if you would like.) I by no means think that every poor behavior needs to be corrected with the rod. But, whatever form of correction we choose to use, making excuses for it and letting it go should not be our plan of action.

Why bring discipline?

“because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” Hebrews 12:6

The Lord disciplines and corrects because He loves us. We need to look at correction as an act of love, not a form of disdain for our children. When we make excuses for our child’s poor behavior, we are basically telling them we don’t love them. If we loved them we would bring correction to them in those moments, even if it means sucking it up in the face of an embarrassing situation, like when we are in the line at the grocery store. Here in lies the problem, when the rubber meets the road many of us are not willing to lay aside our pride and bring loving correction. Instead we would rather make the excuses then forgo the potentially embarrassing situation that correction might bring in that moment. I have to admit I have looked many of those embarrassing situations in the eye and caved to the temporarily easy road of excuse making. Notice, however, I said temporarily. The excuses will never bring about a change to the heart to our children. So while it will alleviate the pressure from us for the moment, it will never get to the root cause of the poor behavior of which is bound up in the hearts of our children. Discipline is designed by God to bring out the the foolishness from their hearts so that when they are faced with that same situation again, they will remember right from wrong in those instances.  

To read more about the Lord bringing discipline to those He loves see a post entitled: “A God of Consequence”.

A word of encouragement

My encouragement  comes as a reminder today. (I am loudly preaching to myself here too.) It is so very important that we remember not to make excuses in the moments of conflict with our children. I don’t know about you, but it hit me pretty hard when I realized that making excuses for my children's poor behavior is like me telling them I do not love them. Love comes in the form of bringing our children’s heart to a place of wanting to choose righteousness for themselves. This will never come by us excusing away their poor behavior choices. My prayer is that when we want to make an excuse for why we can’t bring about correction that we choose a Godly form of discipline instead.

Lord, how easy it is to make excuses for why we can’t deal with the poor behavior of our children right now! Help us in those moments when we would much rather pretend like the situation did not just happen, that we choose Godly discipline over the temporary ease of our pride. Lord, your discipline is loving and always comes to bring about a change of heart not just a change of behavior. Help us to bring a change to the hearts of our children in these moments of conflict. We know that just as every child is different, so is the way in which we should handle discipline in each situation. Give us much wisdom in this area.